9 February 2025
Today was tough. My body, like many Western bodies in India, is struggling to adjust—rejecting even the simplest home-cooked meals. It’s nothing severe, but after days of travel, irregular meals, and unfamiliar foods, my immune system has hit pause. I ache, I feel drained, and with it, waves of uncertainty crash over me.
And yet, beyond the physical discomfort, a deeper realization has emerged—I am not in the right place.
I have changed so much over the last two years, but today, in the presence of this teacher, in this tiny yoga center, I found myself questioning everything. He is kind and knowledgeable, and I have no doubt he can teach me the physical aspects of yoga, but my soul is seeking something much greater—something that is simply not here. This space, which barely qualifies as a living quarter, is not where I am meant to be. I have always embraced simplicity; I would take a tent under the stars over a lavish building any day. But this is different.
This is about worth.
Many of us Westerners still romanticize India as the spiritual heart of the world. And yes, there are sacred spaces and profound teachers, places where ancient wisdom lingers in the air. I have glimpsed that before. But I also see now that much of what is presented as ‘spiritual’ is not designed for seekers like me. The vibrant colors, the hypnotic chants, the intoxicating chaos of the streets—it’s easy to be swept up in the illusion of mysticism. And yet, so much of it lacks true depth.
For some, this journey will be life-changing. It may be the first real spiritual experience they have ever had, and that is beautiful. But for others—souls who are already deeply attuned to something greater—the chase itself may be the illusion. Today, I understood something that brought me to tears.
We no longer need to seek wisdom from an external guru. We are the holy ones. The time of searching for enlightenment outside of ourselves is ending. The High Priestesses, the Light Beings, the awakened selves we have spent lifetimes preparing for—they are already within us. The new golden age is here, and it is calling us to step into our own divinity.
The wisdom of the ancients will always hold power, but their structures and practices were for a different time, a different frequency. Why chase the past when we are meant to birth something new?
This realization is both liberating and terrifying. But it is undeniable. It is time to trust the wisdom that has already awakened within me. It is time to embody the future, not cling to the past.
